Fenrir Logo Fenrir Industries, Inc.
Forced Entry Training & Equipment for Law Enforcement






Have You Seen Me?
Columns
>- Call the Cops!
- Cottonwood
Cove

- Dirty Little
Secrets

- Borderlands of
Science

- Tangled Webb
History Buffs
Tips, Techniques
Tradeshows
Guestbook
Links

E-mail Webmaster







"Guadelupe’s Big Smile"

Guadelupe goes door-to-door asking homeowners for work as a housecleaner. She does this only in affluent neighborhoods.

Here’s Guadelupe’s routine:

She always wears a great big smile, greeting each lady-of-the-house with a cheerful, "good day, madame, my name is Guadelupe and I am here to offer you my services as a very efficient cleaner of homes."

So charming is the manner of this attractive, middle-aged woman that she is rarely turned away. Usually she is invited inside to give an estimate. She always knows where to find dust, even in the cleanest of homes. Visits are 20 minutes or less.

Guadelupe’s rates are reasonable. "Because we have so many valued clients, it is necessary to ask for payment of one week’s service before we can schedule you — I’m sure you understand," Guadelupe says, flashing her huge smile.

After setting appointments for the first and subsequent house cleanings, Guadelupe bids farewell and goes to a neighbor’s house, usually with a glowing recommendation.

The woman seems so very legitimate that nobody complains. After all, service isn’t scheduled to begin for several weeks. But months go by and nothing happens. That’s when cops begin to get calls.

A police sketch artist interviews several witnesses and develops an excellent likeness of the woman. Flyers are circulated.

Time goes by and detectives begin to think the woman has left the area. But Crime Stoppers gets a caller who saw the woman at a restaurant next door to a motel. Cops show the sketch to a motel clerk who identifies the woman.

Her room is staked out, but she doesn’t show up. Undoubtedly, Guadelupe knew she was made. But police get lucky. A traffic unit stops Guadelupe for running a red light.

Recognizing her from the police flyer, cops search her car. They find a satchel containing $30,000 — suspected advance money for house cleaning. Two suitcases in the trunk contain miscellaneous items taken from homes while "estimates" were given. Now Guadelupe gets to mop the hallways at the women’s prison.


Copyright-Bob Ford 2004      


Bob Ford's Call the Cops Logo

Bad Guys Good Guys


As a police reporter turned retired South Carolina Cop, Bob Ford writes "Call the Cops" with authority. "Call the Cops" ranges from the humorous to the outright bizarre and is published in several media throughout the Southeastern United States.   Bob is also CopNet's South Carolina Screening Officer.



Write to Bob Ford at: BobFord@fenrir.com



"Call the Cops!" Archives