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"Hop-a-long"

With a gun pressed up against the back of his head, Mac wonders if this is his payoff for 30 years on the job as an honest cop.

Now retired, Mac is 72 years old. He’s in Florida for a convention with the Fraternal Order of Police.

This night, Mac and his wife of 50 years are coming in from a late night social. As the couple walks across the hotel parking lot, a young punk sticks a pistol against the back of Mac’s head and orders him to unlock his room.

Forcing the couple to get down on their knees at the side of the bed, the punk grabs the wallet from Mac’s back pocket. Fortunately, he doesn’t see Mac’s silver colored "retired" badge. Next he sticks the gun against Pearl’s head and starts pawing through her purse.

At first outraged at seeing his lady threatened by the punk, Mac’s rage turns to cunning. Retired for 20 years, he wonders if he still has any of his "stuff" left. On the job they called him "Mac the Jack" because he could take down the baddest of the bad with a single slam from the heel of his hand.

Problem. With a gun pressed against his wife’s head, Mac fears that if he slams Punk, the gun could go off. Then Mac notices there aren’t any bullets in the cylinder of the punk’s gun.

With the heel of his fist, Mac lands a lightning strike against the punk’s throat. Punk sprawls across the floor, and the gun flies under the bed. Seconds later the punk struggles to his feet, gasping for air. With the heel of one shoe, Mac delivers a solid kick to the side of the punk’s knee.

Knees allow the leg to bend backward — not sideways. With a badly damaged knee joint, the punk’s escape becomes a comical hop-a-long. He’s an easy catch at a hotel filled mostly with vacationing cops.

The punk’s gun turns out to be an imitation, but that’s still armed robbery and in Florida it’ll get you 15 years.

The next day Mac receives a standing ovation from nearly 4,000 FOP delegates from the four corners of the nation. The Orange County Sheriff makes Mac an "honorary deputy." At age 72, Mac the Jack says, "Life is still good!"


Copyright-Bob Ford 2003      


Bob Ford's Call the Cops Logo

Bad Guys Good Guys


As a police reporter turned retired South Carolina Cop, Bob Ford writes "Call the Cops" with authority. "Call the Cops" ranges from the humorous to the outright bizarre and is published in several media throughout the Southeastern United States.   Bob is also CopNet's South Carolina Screening Officer.



Write to Bob Ford at: BobFord@fenrir.com



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